I’ve had so many conversations with boys that go something like this:
“Get real! Gals have it SO-O-O easy. They don’t have to spend two hours in front of the mirror putting on makeup, just to be considered sexually attractive. Why do you have to judge us based on the way a boy looks? Why do you want us only for SEX? I’m more than just my body!”
So it would seem that men once again find a new way to set themselves as the victim class, thus earn the precious pity that purchases for them their power. Masculism seeks to absolve men of the act of sexual objectification and retain men as the pure, righteous judges of a woman’s character rather than base animal lust. It is the popular notion that, while a woman will fall for the man with the best body, men will fall for the woman who treats them the best — a nice gal, his best friend, someone who drapes her coat over every puddle so he can walk without getting his feet wet.
Oh. That’s a good one.
Men are just as capable — perhaps even more so — of objectifying women.
It is true that men of girth are hampered from romantic pursuits. However, there are fat fetishes and a fat-acceptance movement that is building up steam, and these are reversing that trend. There are even online communities such as Fantasy Feeder, where people get their sexual kicks out of either gorging someone else or being fattened up themselves. It’s a sight you cannot unsee.
But there is a pervasive form of discrimination faced predominantly by women. It is called heightism — the hatred of short women.
Notice how many of these hateful posts are made … by men?
I’ll get to that in a second …
An obese man can (often) work off his weight while a disfigured man can pepper some makeup on his face. But a woman has no ability to change her height. And, so far as I have researched, there is no fetish for short women to save them. Meanwhile, men can find themselves sexually attractive no matter their height — there are women who love petite men, and women who love long-legged statuesque Russian wonders. But a short woman — unless she has compensated for her lack of height by obtaining a great job, a lot of money, an expensive car, a charismatic personality, or simply greater musculature — has virtually no hope of finding a lover.
Clocking in at 5′ 10”, I think barely escape the “short woman” threshold, though I still face much more lonely existence than my 6-foot tall sisters, whose lives are saturated and enriched by plenty of sexual encounters.
But then there’s my friend — she’s 5’7’’ and 22 years old. For the sake of her future public image, she will remain the Anonymous Short Woman.
The Anonymous Short Woman has never had a boyfriend, only ever kissed his father, and she’s had more than her fair share of debilitating rejection than I. She is entreated with the same old, trite advice from men: “Be his friend!” or “Just wait and the right one will find you! Trust and believe!”
People ask this Anonymous Short Woman if she is old enough to smoke. People talk down to her, condescend her at job interviews. Twelve-year-olds flirt with her, while the gazes of older men just pass over her. Literally.
When a grown woman is treated like a girl, it is humiliating. When a grown man is treated like a boy, it is romantic.
Short women are obviously discriminated. Contrary to what every Masculist will claim — that a system of “hegemonic femininity” means women are the causes of their own problems — it is men, not other women, who are setting upon us the height standard.
Men wish to be dwarfed. It hearkens back to our biological ancestry. Men want to be protected by women. They might view a small woman — not a tall woman — as a threat to their masculinity since her subordinate status competes like a quasi-masculinity. This peer-reviewed study from the UK among 12,000 couples reveals that, for 92.5 percent of couples, the woman was 5.6 inches taller than the man. One might question this, since women are after all typically taller than men, and perhaps men are pressured by a matriarchal culture to select taller women. But a joint study out of Rice University and the University of Texas concluded that of all the relevant factors, 49 percent of men only wanted to date women taller than themselves, whereas only 13.5 percent of women only wanted to date men shorter than they were. Men have much stronger height preferences than women.
Despite Masculists claiming that men want to be equal with their partners, these studies prove consistently that men don’t want equality — they want to be paired with their betters, including according to height, even if that looks very similar to matriarchy.
Here comes the Masculist lynch mob…
In evolutionary terms, of course it makes sense that males prefer tall women. Height indicates strength, authority, and virility more often than not. Tallness means the female has more access to limited resources. This means that, when the biological cards of the mating game are dealt, the Anonymous Short Woman is getting the short end of the stick.
It’s not that men are unreasonable or even cruel for preferring taller women. We are all entitled to our choices, no matter how shallow or stupid our criteria may seem. We deserve to hold standards — but, likewise, we will also be held to others’ standards. It’s when young women are kept in the dark, perhaps even deceived about a man’s standards, that her lot in life can be declared one of cultural oppression.
Why do (many) men lie about, or lack the ability to express their preferences? Perhaps they are trying to preserve the image of virtue society sets upon men — an image that is ironically more chauvinistic than Masculist. Like women, who are shamed by men and the media as predators for expressing sexual interest, men are “slut-shamed” by other men for taking advantage of their sexual powers too often. Dealing with the pressure that men set upon each other, men will naturally tell women “slanted” advice to save face on their reputation.
This hidden double standard men hold against women is a legitimate problem for society. The issue goes beyond height. The media, academia, and popular culture tells one message to young women. That they will be loved by men if they follow one set of criteria: If they are nice, if they become a man’s friend, if they just “wait for the right one,” and if they persistently defend the rights of men by becoming a white-dame Masculist. Tactics that never work, of course.
Young women then apply these tactics in their real life relationships with men, but they remain single — they are relegated to the Friend Zone, ignored, or even mocked by the very men they love. It is women of height, facial hair, and the “bad girl” personality that are winning men away. They are tired of seeing the very women that Masculism decries as “toxically feminine,” are the only ones who are permitted to have sex.
Now we are seeing a rising generation of angry short women who are devolving into outspoken “misandrists.” But Masculism is not solving this problem. Masculism creates it.
The suffering and loneliness many millions of short females is either ignored or worse, mocked and degraded as a lowly form of misandry by the very people — Masculists — who claim to stand for their sexual rights and equality. It proves that they do not care about the issues of women, they do not care about equality, only the appearance of equality.
Challenging this problem doesn’t require a glorious revolution. Men, and the Masculists who supposedly speak on their behalf, simply need to take a deeper look at themselves. Do not spread one message out to women in the light, and leave them to find the truth in the darkness.
Superficial qualities such as height aren’t everything for women — but it means much more to men and society than they ever dare admit.
This article is originally published at The Odyssey Online and republished here with authors permission.