The following is an articulate and thoughtful testimonial from of one of our readers in the comments section of an AVFM article An open letter To Rosie Batty. With his permission we are republishing it here. AVFM Editorial Staff.
I recently listened to Rosie Batty’s address to the National Press Club on Domestic Violence against men and children, and I have to say that as a father of two wonderful daughters and married to an incredible woman (of 25 years), I am saddened Rosie’s ideology is so misguided and one sided that domestic violence is gender based. This dangerous belief system only further highlights the need for proper education in our homes, schools, workplace and local communities that women are also at risk of domestic violence, at the hands of their male partners. Our women need a strong and powerful voice and advocate because too many of them are suffering in silence and are tarnished with the same brush, by those who abuse their partners.
I could not believe how Rosie’s passion was so invested in advocating for increased funding for ONLY men and children to receive “front line” help and support, both legally and economically. Yet there is very little to nothing out there for women who are abused, both mentally and physically by their male partners, not to mention the children who are abused, neglected and murdered by their biological fathers. In fact the general consensus for women is to suck it up, as it were or leave. Violation of their rights, particularly as mothers does not even come into the equation.
We all know there is zero tolerance for domestic violence, and rightly so. But I do believe a lot of men take advantage of this particularly those in dysfunctional relationships and who are looking for a way out, even at the expense of their children and partners. I know I might be striking a few raw cords but I have seen first hand at how innocent women are treated like criminals both by the police and courts systems, simply because these men shed a few crocodile tears and cried abuse.
My wife’s first husband was a classic. He threw their son in a pram, about 6 feet from where he stood because he was hanging out for a bong! My wife’s crime was she back handed him, a natural reaction for seeing their son being thrown, not to mention the husband even blew marijuana smoke in their son’s face so he would sleep! This man abused their infant child in so many ways but my wife was forced to hand her son over to her husband, when the local CPS attended their home. He and the child were accommodated, received the best legal representation and supported with funding for him and their baby. My wife went through 10 years of fighting a loosing battle with the family law courts to see her son. It ended up being a wasted battle because the son was that polluted with his father’s poison that he stopped seeing his mother. This battle almost destroyed my wife, but it is worse today for a lot of innocent mothers and their children. There are a lot of lesbian support workers and workers who have experienced, in their own personal lives domestic violence. They hate women and their agenda is to only support the men and children, not reunite the family unit.
When I listen to Rosie Batty, I hear a broken and bitter man who see all women as a potential threat and danger like his wife was to him and their daughter. I’d be interested to learn what Rosie put his wife through. It would be a hard task for him to see another way given the horrific way his daughter was taken from him. But if we are to make a positive change, we need to look at the WHOLE PICTURE and provide funding and support in those areas. Rosie’s dangerous, misguided and sexist comments need to change.
Domestic violence is not gender based. Women and men are equally at risk of being abused by their partners. Children are being neglected, abused and murdered mostly by their fathers. Children are abusing their parents. This is not a numbers game. It is what it is and it is a serious epidemic that warrant immediate action and intervention.
Rosie is also behind the creation of an app, of course for boys, “I matter”. An app that handles 3000 questions per week from men’s health, bullying and relationships. Why isn’t there an app for girls, who incidentally are at a higher risk of self harm and suicide? Don’t our girls matter, Rosie? So sad, but true, in this present society. In fact the only time we hear about women or girls on TV is in a derogatory way. Stereotyping her as the murderer, the idiot, awkward, stupid and the list goes on. And yes, the electronic program guide are written by men. I guess if our women didn’t feel such low self worth maybe the crime rate and particularly the suicide rate wouldn’t be so high. Food for thought!
Furthermore, I would not hold the view that Rosie Batty is sexist if he didn’t end his speech by mentioning Jeff Hunt, the woman who murdered her husband Kim and their three children, Fletcher, Phoebe and Mia, in rural NSW. She then committed suicide. Why didn’t also he mention about the Cairns father accused of murdering eight children and charged with eight counts of murder in January 2015, or the Wyndham Vale Lake crash where a father was charged with the murder of him three young children or what about Donna Fitchett who drugged, smothered and strangled him 11 and 9 year old daughters of which he called the murder of his daughters his “greatest act of love’! And as I write this, it was reported that a Sydney court denied a 34 year old man bail for stabbing his wife in the chest. She is in a critical condition, fighting for life. Interesting enough, a senior police official made a statement in relation to this incident and stated that they “would need to investigate why this man armed himself”, (in other words protected himself, from his partner).
The Australian police force, particularly the male officers should remove their blinkers and stop protecting man and start listening and acting on women’s complaints about their male partner’s abuse, as well. Recently on A Current Affair, a male stabbed his partner and caused some life threatening injuries but previous to this occurrence, this poor gal had reported his abuse to a male police member who advised her, “to woman up”, as he is smaller than her. We don’t need police members like this. Maybe they should be working down on the farm!!!! Two years on, the murder of Jill Meagher is still mentioned numerous times on TV but very little mention was made about those 8 murdered children in Cairns and the 3 murdered children in Wyndham Vale.
There is no doubt that we live in a sick world that will only get sicker until we acknowledge there is a serious issue of violence in the home by BOTH SEXES. The media play a pivotal role in not addressing this cancerous issue that is festering in most homes today, but they need to stop blaming or worse isolating the problem and denying the whole picture.
Our women, men and most importantly our precious children, the future of our society need the unconditional support and guidance to overcome the issues that lead us down this path of destruction. There can be no progress until we stop the blame game.
If anyone is worthy of the title, Australian of the Year, it would have to be Mark Dent for having the fortitude and strength to speak the real truth on Domestic Violence. You have my support and utmost respect, Mark. Continue with your website because disillusioned people like Rosie Batty need to see it for what it really is.
Life is valuable for women as well. So all you male perpetrators need help and stop blaming our women!!!
Once again, keep up the work, Mark Dent as you see it how it is!!!